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I just want to fix it!
It’s funny how God seems not to be able to teach me anything without hammering it into me in about 10 different ways. Just at the moment I seem to be falling into the same trap over and over again with people. I just want to be able to fix their problems, have them make good decisions, and have the issue go away. But I guess that lots of what’s really going on is that I need to be able to learn to let things go – accept that I can’t make things right all the time, and that people still have to be able to make their own mistakes. And there’s undoubtedly a need for me to grow in huility and learn that I don’t always have the answers.
But it sucks.
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3 Comments
I’ve been playing with that concept a bit lately. How do you guide someone you care about towards making good decisions for themselves? I have no idea. Anyone who knows me, knows that I could lecture pretty much anyone into a corner about what I think they should do and why. For some reason though, some people just don’t like cold, hard logical conclusions.
The best I’ve come up with so far, is to try to be some kind of sounding board in such situations. It’s easy to tell people why they’ve made a mistake. But if that person was ready to hear it in a sentence, then they’d already understand it – and wouldn’t have made a bad decision in the first place.
To be a friendly ear who tries in earnest to understand and walks the journey with us as we try to understand things that are not yet clear… that is a valuable quality to possess. I hope one day I get close enough to it to be useful to someone.
You there! Broken person! Yes, you! I pray increased faith on you! And wisdom too!
Hmm. It’s a good one Geoff. I’m amazed how my attitude to people changes when I remember to pray from them in my QTs, but it doesn’t make the pain and frustration of their hurt/struggle diminish. But I suppose that’s what bearing each other’s burdens is about.
I really struggle with this concept in particular in relation to my parents: honouring them seems really, really tough at times: what I see as lack of faith/refusal to shift headspace I think could accurately also be described as fear. Then me jumping up and down on their head is just outright rude: and I realise why we’re being instructed to honour our parents in the first place.
Haha
I read this, and I thought of a few things I was hoping it related to. Geoff… can i fix you? pweeeeeeaaaaaaase?
not that i’m ever guilty of the same thing or anything.
Even Chris Martin has trouble with it… (and I will try-ei-ei to fix you)
I think the Taoists have a remarkable knack for figuring this stuff out… and if you are brave Geoff, and unaffraid that you may become an instant heretic, I recommend you look up their stuff. Actually they’re a bunch of pretty wise chinese dudes who sat around and figured out some basic things about life and wrote it down.
What will be, will be.
God grant me the courage to change the things I can,
the grace to accept the things I can’t,
and the wisdom to know the difference.
(the AA prayer)
Its tough when as christians we try to take responsibility for our influence over everything… and not just for the things we are specifically responsible for.
Often we get so focused on trying to MAKE things happen when we should only be saying “this is what I believe is best, and this is how I will support that” and then walking away. I’m really struggling with that with Young Adults at the moment. There are so many things we’ve set as goals that have fallen by the wayside, so many great ideas and things we could be, do, and acheive… and I want to MAKE that happen… but its neither my responsibility, nor my place to do that.